5 Tips for Visiting Your Loved One’s House While Grieving

If you’re mentally preparing yourself for visiting or cleaning out a loved one’s home after they have passed, you’ll know that this is an emotional time, and you may require additional support. To help make the experience as warm and smooth as possible, we’ve compiled some tips to help.

1. Don’t set expectations for your first visit

In the aftermath of losing a loved one, your initial visit to their home isn’t meant to be focused on productivity or practicalities. Instead, you can prioritise immediate concerns, such as ensuring the well-being of any pets, locating important documents, and securing the property since it won’t be inhabited. Tasks related to the organisation and distribution of belongings can wait for later, allowing you the necessary time and space to navigate your emotions and begin the grieving process.

2. Bring a close friend

Stepping into the empty home of a loved one who has passed can be daunting, and it’s not uncommon for all kinds of emotions to catch you by surprise. Consider asking a friend or a family member to accompany you. (Remember, they don't necessarily need to assist with clearing out belongings or making decisions about sentimental items. There are some things you may want to do alone, with family, or with professionals. More on that below.)

3. Hire a professional cleaning or decluttering service 

Yes! As we touched on above, there are professional services available to assist during challenging times. These professionals offer valuable support in tasks such as clearing out the homes of the deceased, managing belongings in hoarding situations, and overall home organisation and decluttering – for a fee. It's worth considering these options as they can significantly alleviate the burden and provide much-needed help during difficult life transitions. These professionals offer compassionate and non-judgemental assistance, providing invaluable support and lightening the load for those facing these challenges alone.

4. Take regular breaks

Seeing furniture, clothing, and childhood photographs, immersed in a nostalgic setting filled with familiar scents, sights, and sounds, often evokes a flood of memories – both joyful and sorrowful. It’s perfectly normal to experience emotional waves during these times, and this is why it’s so important to take breaks often. Consider taking a stroll around the block, limiting your visits to an hour each day (instead of devoting a whole day to a large task), or finding solace in the quiet of the backyard.

5. Feel the feelings, but auto-pilot is also okay

In times of grief, we’re often encouraged to express our emotions freely and let the healing process unfold naturally. While this is important for our well-being, there may be moments when practical tasks demand our attention. It’s perfectly acceptable to switch to autopilot mode temporarily, focusing on completing necessary tasks like turning off utilities, gathering sentimental items, sorting through belongings to create a ‘donate’ pile, or cleaning out the fridge. Know that there’s no right or wrong way to grieve, and prioritising practicalities doesn’t diminish the authenticity of your grief experience.

Wrap up

It’s important to refrain from placing undue pressure on yourself during the first visit. Initially, you can focus on critical tasks such as ensuring the well-being of pets and gathering essential documents. If support from friends or family isn’t available, consider reaching out to professionals for assistance, alleviating the burden of navigating this process alone. Remember to prioritise self-care by taking breaks, acknowledging that progress in these situations may be gradual but is still significant. Be kind to yourself and recognise that every step forward, no matter how small, is a meaningful step. 

Found this blog helpful? When you’re ready, discover How To: Sell The House of a Loved One.

Disclaimer: The content of this blog is intended to provide a general guide to the subject matter. This blog should not be relied upon as legal, financial, accounting or tax advice.